Depth Over Dick: Choosing Alignment, Healing & Loving Yourself Loudly
“I won’t wait around for half-assed affection or breadcrumbed love stories that go nowhere. I’m not interested in being someone’s “maybe” anymore.
Because what I bring to the table isn’t just dinner—it’s flavorful food, lit candles, deep connection, unmatched head, and love that heals ancestral trauma.”
Soulmates, Silver Linings, & Love Written in The Stars
“My mom is the oxygen that sustains the air-flow to his lungs. She is the reason his heart keeps on beating one struggling tick after another.
She is the life force that surrounds this man’s aura.
And I noticed for the few days my mother was admitted in the hospital, once she was removed from his electromagnetic field—the light fading slowly around my father as his worry grew.”
The 90s Sitcoms Lied: Reinventing Yourself Isn’t a Midlife Crisis
“UNLEARNING TAKES GUTS. REWRITING YOUR LIFE MID-WAY THROUGH ISN’T EASY.
IT PISSES PEOPLE THE FUCK OFF. IT MAKES THEM UNCOMFORTABLE. BECAUSE WHEN YOU WAKE UP, YOU SHOW OTHERS HOW DEEPLY ASLEEP THEY STILL ARE.”
Entry Eight: Right from Wrong & Hanes Her Way
"TIME TO HIKE MY HANES HER WAY
GRANNY PANTIES ABOVE MY C-SECTION SCAR AND CALL IT A
FUCKING DAY..
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DO UNTIL MY ANXIETY KICKED IN WEARING PLATFORM
HEELS WHILE LIGHTING MY
NERVOUS SYSTEM ON FIRE LIKE IT WAS 1997 AND SOMEONE JUST PLAYED BOYS II MEN OVER A SLOW-MOTION BREAKUP SCENE.
TERRIBLE, I KNOW."
Entry Seven- Holiday Jitters, Diabetes, & The Holy Spirit
“As the kids got older I stopped giving a shit about baskets. I upgraded to gift bags because I refuse – REFUSE – to keep buying grass filler that will haunt anyone like a post-Christmas pity fuck accompanied by an STD from your hometown crush – and once stud.”
Manifest. Mourn. Masturbate. Repeat: A Midlife Awakening
“I HAD A HEART-TO-HEART WITH MY PHYSICIAN RECENTLY AND EXPLAINED TO HER THAT THERE IS ONE THING IN LIFE I REFUSE TO GIVE UP. AND THAT MY FRIENDS ARE ORGASMS...
THE FACT THAT MY ANTI-ANXIETY MEDICATION LIKES TO NUMB MY CLITORIS, ISN’T A WIN IN MY BOOK. I’D RATHER LIVE WITH MY ANXIETY AND JERK OFF ALL DAY WITH SOME ACTUAL FEELING IN MY GENITALS. LIFE IS SHORT, AND ORGASMS ARE SACRED.”
